How not to talk to your doctor

Pediatrician Dr. Barney Softness writes a guest blog today on The New York Times about how not to talk to your pediatrician. Included in the recommendations are to not make promises you cannot keep and not to trick your kids into a trip to the doctor. But the recommendation that generated the most discussion was "Don't tell me your diagnosis." His point was that a thorough description of the symptoms is of more value than a parent simply coming into rule out one diagnosis that they believe is the problem. There was a spirited discussion in the comments section about this assertion. Dr. Softness later clarified that any doctor certainly wants to know about any family history, social history and even what the parent thinks the problem may be. But parents should come in with an open mind and not just to rule out a diagnosis.

As some of the commenters suggested, it is in the approach. As we have discussed before on this forum, effective patient-physician communication requires openness and honesty from both parties. Patients need to be proactive in their care, be able to clearly and honestly articulate their symptoms, and should be open to listening to what the doctor suggests. Doctors need to really listen to their patients, educate them about what they are doing, and encourage them to be engaged in their care. Both parties need to be respectful of the expertise of the other: the doctor who is in expert in medicine and the patient who is an expert on their own body.

You can find the article here: http://well.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/03/27/what-not-to-say-to-the-pediatrician/.

So what about the question one of the commenters posed: Instead of a list of don'ts, how should a patient talk to their doctor?