When words, and friends, fail

An essay in The New York Times today highlights the difficulty of going through a health crisis and having friends seemingly disappear. Psychologists are beginning to explore what people experience when they are witness to other's traumas. Part of the difficulty, is that words fail, and friends don't know what to say to a sick friend or how to help. The other difficulty is not so much a lack of empathy, but too much empathy. When a healthy friend can picture herself or her child as sick as the sick friend, it may give them cause to pull away from that friend in need.

Sometimes the right words and the right actions don't come naturally. But knowing our own fears and vulnerabilities may help us think twice and reach out to those in need.